November

Jump by Larry Miller, 2022

A compelling autobiography that proves it is never too late to turn your life around, Jump tells the story of Larry Miller's early involvement with gangs while growing up in Philadelphia. Well, perhaps it is too late now... 

Part of Miller's redeption includes earning his GED in college as well as receiving training as a software engineer and getting paid to work as a software engineer while serving out his sentece for murder and armed robberies. These rehabilitation programs are no longer offered in many penitenceries, something Miller highlights and pleads to put back in place.

Miller talks about his headaches and constant nightmares about has past as he gets promoted through the ranks at Campbell Soup, Jantzen, Nike, Portland Trailblazers, and Jordan Brand/Nike.

A few intersting notes:

* Miller is able to transition companies without a background check. It shows how muhc of success in business is tied to networking: He was hired by references and word of mouth rather any formal vetting process.

* Miller started off in Accounting before transitioning to Operations/COO before becoming President/Chairman of Portland Trailblazers and Jordan Brand respectively. Ultimately, running a company is about numbers/requires knowing your numbers. 

* A vision is important to be a leader. When Miller joined Nike, he pushed for apparel to match with the shoes. This initial forray into fashion laid the foundation in the billion dollar industry that is athleisure ware today.

* Miller was also able to make hard decisions. Firing people who would not align with where he needed the company to go, pushing to have the business side of basketball work with the operations/sports side of basketball (e.g. the head coach) at the Trailblazers. The latter example also shows the importance of teamwork and building a cohesive leadership team.

Searching for Sylvie Lee by Jean Kwok, 2019

A story about a Tsoisonese-American woman who grew up in the Netherlands, this book was recommended by a co-worker after my return from a reent trip to Amsterdam.

A thriller with cliched characters, the story is told from the vantage point of the missing Sylvie Lee, her American sister Amy and their mother. 

The story centers around Sylvie, who grew up with her Dutch cousin Lukas and his parents Helena and Willem. 

Sylvie's grandmother was also brought into Helena and Willem's household to help raise Sylvie as Sylvie's parents in America were unable to care for her.

As meek Amy travels to the Netherlands in attempts to retrace Sylvie's last steps, she unravels the facade of Sylvie's 'perfect' life, including her childhood.

The book dragged a bit but did provide insight into Dutch culture. There is a straightforwardness to the Dutch and quirks such as keeping their curtains open as to note that they have nothing to hide. 

Despite it being a liberal and welcoming county to immigrants, there is also racism with a children's song mocking the Chinese and pulling slanty eyes gestures.

Their language (and culture) though, is neither whimsical, quirky or insightful as the French, Japanese and Indian languages can be respectively. 

Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming the Parent You Want to Be by Dr. Becky Kennedy, 2022

A compelling read, I took so many notes. Kennedy's basic premise is that children are good inside and if we remember this, we realize (bad) behaviors are due to emotional disregulation and if we address the deregulation, the good behavior will follow.

This is a switch from the reward charts (where behaviors are rewarded) to address parenting a child's actions and behaviors.

The biggest take away for me is that when a child is engaging in bad behavior (throwing a tantrum, not doing what is asked), that a parent needs to connect to the child first, and then work with the child on the desired behavior.

This take-away spills over to the high school students I now interact with at my new job. Even the kids who are disrespectful and break the rules, I remind myself that they are good inside and focus on how to connect with them.

Part of me is conflicted by the thought that sometimes a child needs to do what is being asked, regardless of whether the child wants to or if the child feels connected. 

Overall though, the tips on connection are something I take to heart and have proven to be successful with my 10-year-old daughter. A particular favorite now is to hug my daughter until her Mom-o-Meter is filled to defuse potential conflict.

Another take-away is that when we think of breaking parenting dramas that have been passed down, it does not start with our children, but with ourselves. So if I want my daughter to be more self-assured in her identity, I need to be more self-assured in mine and modeling this for her.

I do remember my friends discussing this book when it first came out since it there was a lot of buzz about it. My daughter was a toddler then and behaving 'well' so not something that caught my attention.